Based on research originally published in: Wang, M., Chen, X., & Zheng, S. (2024). Parental reactions to child negative emotions and child behavioral adjustment: The moderating role of child inhibitory control. International Journal of Behavioral Development, 48(5), 422-433. This article is freely available exclusively for readers of the Child & Family Blog for a limited period.
Imagine a parent preparing for their five-year-old’s birthday party. The balloons are up, the cupcakes are ready, and friends are singing Happy Birthday! But instead of smiling, the child bursts into tears – overwhelmed by the attention and noise. The parent may feel frustrated and confused by this reaction to the fun celebration they planned.
Photo by KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA on Pexels
Moments like these – small, emotional crossroads – happen regularly in parenting. Whether a meltdown over a lost toy, a burst of frustration when a puzzle piece does not fit properly, or a quiet withdrawal during a noisy event, these behaviors are common, daily opportunities for caregivers to guide their children’s emotional growth.
Caregivers’ reactions can leave lasting impressions, especially when a child is upset, frustrated, or overwhelmed. They influence how children learn to manage and regulate their own emotions, relate to others, and handle future challenges. Reactions to children’s negative emotions might matter more than caregivers realize.
Supportive reactions involve parents recognizing, validating, and constructively guiding children through their difficult emotions. For instance, think back to the birthday party scenario. When a child feels overwhelmed and bursts into tears, a supportive reaction might be kneeling down gently and offering comfort, saying, “Do you want to take a quiet moment with me?”
In contrast, non-supportive reactions typically involve dismissing or minimizing the child’s emotional expressions, or even punishing the child for their behavior. In the same scenario, a non-supportive response might be responding impatiently, “Come on, this is supposed to be fun!”
Research – much of it conducted in Western countries – shows that supportive parental reactions to children’s negative emotions are linked to positive outcomes, such as better emotion regulation, fewer behavior problems, and stronger prosocial behaviors. In contrast, non-supportive reactions are generally associated with negative outcomes, including lower levels of social competence and more emotional and behavioral difficulties.
Findings from studies of Chinese families are more mixed: While supportive reactions predict better emotional regulation, the negative effects of non-supportive reactions, especially minimization, are less consistently observed, suggesting possible cultural differences.
Children have their own unique temperament – the typical way they respond to their surroundings. One important aspect of children’s temperament that is related to their self-regulation is inhibitory control, or children’s ability to restrain inappropriate behaviors and responses.
Inhibitory control develops gradually over time and with guidance. However, some children have a harder time with this aspect of temperament than others. They may act out more quickly, struggle to follow the rules, or have difficulty calming down after becoming upset.
Imagine a preschool classroom in which the teacher asks children to transition from playing to quietly listening to a story: Some children settle down quickly and calmly, while others continue to play, become restless, or find it difficult to remain seated. These behaviors reflect differences in children’s abilities to self-regulate.
Photo by ShotPot on Pexels
Children with stronger inhibitory control can manage their impulses more effectively, whereas children with lower levels of inhibitory control often find it harder to regulate their emotions and behaviors. This raises an important question for caregivers: Do parents’ supportive reactions matter more for children who naturally struggle with self-regulation?
In a recent study, we examined to what extent Chinese mothers’ and fathers’ reactions to their young children’s negative emotions predicted children’s adjustment over time, and to what extent these effects depended on children’s inhibitory control. Mothers and fathers of 113 Chinese preschoolers (age range 45 to 73 months) recruited from three preschools in a small city in middle China completed two questionnaires six months apart. On average, both mothers and fathers were in their early 30s (age range 23 to 47 years), and they had an average of about 14.5 years of education. Annual household income varied between 10,000 yuan to 500,000 yuan (about $1,437 to $71,850).
Parents reported their reactions to their children’s negative emotions and their impressions of their children’s inhibitory control and adjustment. The questions about adjustment addressed children’s externalizing problems (hyperactivity-inattention, e.g., “easily distracted, concentration wanders,” and conduct problems, e.g., “often fights with other children or bullies them”), internalizing problems (emotional problems, e.g., “often unhappy, depressed or tearful” and peer problems, e.g., “picked on or bullied by other children”), and prosocial behaviors (cooperative and kind behaviors, e.g., “kind to younger children”).
Mothers’ supportive reactions did not predict children’s externalizing problems, but for some children, fathers’ supportive reactions did. Traditionally, in Chinese families, fathers are seen as the main authority figures responsible for discipline, while mothers play a more nurturing and caregiving role. Supportive reactions from fathers may be particularly salient and influential when it comes to externalizing behaviors (e.g., hyperactivity, aggression, rule-breaking), which are often the focus of disciplinary efforts.
Fathers’ supportive reactions predicted externalizing behaviors for children with lower levels of inhibitory control. More specifically, the more likely fathers were to respond to these children’s emotional outbursts with empathy, patience, and guidance, the more likely these children were to show fewer externalizing problems six months later.
Supportive paternal reactions may help children manage their strong emotions before they escalate into problematic behaviors. In this way, fathers can serve as a supportive emotion socialization agent (i.e., someone whose interactions with children model, teach, or otherwise facilitate children’s understanding and management of emotions), particularly for...
Key takeaways for caregivers
- Supportive reactions to children’s negative emotions include helping them deal with their problems, using strategies like comforting or distracting to help them feel better, and encouraging them to express their negative emotions.
- Non-supportive reactions to children’s negative emotions include using verbal or physical punishment to reduce their negative emotional expression, thinking little of their problems or painful reactions, and becoming distressed when faced with their negative emotions.
- Our research with Chinese families indicates that both mothers’ and fathers’ supportive reactions to their four- to six-year-olds’ negative emotions predict aspects of the children’s adjustment, though in different ways.
- Inhibitory control is the ability to restrain inappropriate behaviors and responses. Children with lower levels of inhibitory control have more difficulty regulating their behaviors and emotions. For those children, the positive effects of parents’ supportive reactions to children’s negative emotions were more pronounced.
- Chinese fathers’ supportive reactions to their four- to six-year-olds’ negative emotions predicted fewer externalizing problems (e.g., hyperactivity, inattention, conduct problems) six months later, but only for children who had more difficulty with self-control.
- Chinese mothers’ supportive reactions predicted more prosocial behaviors (e.g., sharing, helping, showing empathy), but only for children with low levels of inhibitory control. In contrast, Chinese fathers’ supportive reactions predicted more prosocial behaviors for children across levels of inhibitory control abilities.
Imagine a parent preparing for their five-year-old’s birthday party. The balloons are up, the cupcakes are ready, and friends are singing Happy Birthday! But instead of smiling, the child bursts into tears – overwhelmed by the attention and noise. The parent may feel frustrated and confused by this reaction to the fun celebration they planned.
Photo by KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA on Pexels
Moments like these – small, emotional crossroads – happen regularly in parenting. Whether a meltdown over a lost toy, a burst of frustration when a puzzle piece does not fit properly, or a quiet withdrawal during a noisy event, these behaviors are common, daily opportunities for caregivers to guide their children’s emotional growth.
The importance of caregivers’ reactions to children’s negative emotions: Factors to consider
Caregivers’ reactions can leave lasting impressions, especially when a child is upset, frustrated, or overwhelmed. They influence how children learn to manage and regulate their own emotions, relate to others, and handle future challenges. Reactions to children’s negative emotions might matter more than caregivers realize.
Supportive versus non-supportive reactions
Supportive reactions involve parents recognizing, validating, and constructively guiding children through their difficult emotions. For instance, think back to the birthday party scenario. When a child feels overwhelmed and bursts into tears, a supportive reaction might be kneeling down gently and offering comfort, saying, “Do you want to take a quiet moment with me?”
In contrast, non-supportive reactions typically involve dismissing or minimizing the child’s emotional expressions, or even punishing the child for their behavior. In the same scenario, a non-supportive response might be responding impatiently, “Come on, this is supposed to be fun!”
Research – much of it conducted in Western countries – shows that supportive parental reactions to children’s negative emotions are linked to positive outcomes, such as better emotion regulation, fewer behavior problems, and stronger prosocial behaviors. In contrast, non-supportive reactions are generally associated with negative outcomes, including lower levels of social competence and more emotional and behavioral difficulties.
Findings from studies of Chinese families are more mixed: While supportive reactions predict better emotional regulation, the negative effects of non-supportive reactions, especially minimization, are less consistently observed, suggesting possible cultural differences.
Children’s temperament: Inhibitory control
Children have their own unique temperament – the typical way they respond to their surroundings. One important aspect of children’s temperament that is related to their self-regulation is inhibitory control, or children’s ability to restrain inappropriate behaviors and responses.
Inhibitory control develops gradually over time and with guidance. However, some children have a harder time with this aspect of temperament than others. They may act out more quickly, struggle to follow the rules, or have difficulty calming down after becoming upset.
Imagine a preschool classroom in which the teacher asks children to transition from playing to quietly listening to a story: Some children settle down quickly and calmly, while others continue to play, become restless, or find it difficult to remain seated. These behaviors reflect differences in children’s abilities to self-regulate.
Photo by ShotPot on Pexels
Children with stronger inhibitory control can manage their impulses more effectively, whereas children with lower levels of inhibitory control often find it harder to regulate their emotions and behaviors. This raises an important question for caregivers: Do parents’ supportive reactions matter more for children who naturally struggle with self-regulation?
Does a child’s ability to control impulses shape how caregivers’ responses to their negative emotions affect their behavior?
In a recent study, we examined to what extent Chinese mothers’ and fathers’ reactions to their young children’s negative emotions predicted children’s adjustment over time, and to what extent these effects depended on children’s inhibitory control. Mothers and fathers of 113 Chinese preschoolers (age range 45 to 73 months) recruited from three preschools in a small city in middle China completed two questionnaires six months apart. On average, both mothers and fathers were in their early 30s (age range 23 to 47 years), and they had an average of about 14.5 years of education. Annual household income varied between 10,000 yuan to 500,000 yuan (about $1,437 to $71,850).
Parents reported their reactions to their children’s negative emotions and their impressions of their children’s inhibitory control and adjustment. The questions about adjustment addressed children’s externalizing problems (hyperactivity-inattention, e.g., “easily distracted, concentration wanders,” and conduct problems, e.g., “often fights with other children or bullies them”), internalizing problems (emotional problems, e.g., “often unhappy, depressed or tearful” and peer problems, e.g., “picked on or bullied by other children”), and prosocial behaviors (cooperative and kind behaviors, e.g., “kind to younger children”).
Fathers’ supportive reactions predicted fewer externalizing problems, but only for children with more difficulty controlling their impulses
Mothers’ supportive reactions did not predict children’s externalizing problems, but for some children, fathers’ supportive reactions did. Traditionally, in Chinese families, fathers are seen as the main authority figures responsible for discipline, while mothers play a more nurturing and caregiving role. Supportive reactions from fathers may be particularly salient and influential when it comes to externalizing behaviors (e.g., hyperactivity, aggression, rule-breaking), which are often the focus of disciplinary efforts.
Fathers’ supportive reactions predicted externalizing behaviors for children with lower levels of inhibitory control. More specifically, the more likely fathers were to respond to these children’s emotional outbursts with empathy, patience, and guidance, the more likely these children were to show fewer externalizing problems six months later.
Supportive paternal reactions may help children manage their strong emotions before they escalate into problematic behaviors. In this way, fathers can serve as a supportive emotion socialization agent (i.e., someone whose interactions with children model, teach, or otherwise facilitate children’s understanding and management of emotions), particularly for...